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When is sex dirty?

I recently had a conversation with a co-worker on American views of sex and sexuality (spawned from my “How is that OK?” post).  He has a 15 year old friend who is in a sexual relationship with his 17 year old girlfriend.  When the girlfriend’s parents found out, they banned her from seeing him anymore.  My co-worker believes this was the wrong response on the part of the parents and that America has ‘really dropped the ball regarding sex’.

He commented that his “grandparents thought sex was dirty”.  I began to think about that statement – “sex is dirty”.  Of course we know its not ‘dirty’.  We know that sex was created by God and that we naturally crave it.  So why would someone believe sex is ‘dirty’?  Well, I thought, what does it mean to be dirty?  Dirt isn’t bad, right?  We need dirt to make bricks, we need dirt to grow food, we use it to make pottery, to grow grass and plants – in fact, without dirt, we couldn’t survive.  So when does something become ‘dirty’?  When its not suppose to have dirt on it. 

I don’t mind dirt in my garden; I don’t want it on my shirt.  When my son runs through the yard and falls – his clothes are then dirty, and that’s a bad thing.  Not because dirt is bad but because having it on his clothes is.  So then, when is sex dirty?  When it is where it shouldn’t be.  Sex on a billboard ad doesn’t make sex dirty – it makes the ad dirty.

Sex in godly context is fun and amazing and worth it, but sex outside of a marriage can have disastrous affects.  How many STDs would we have if sex were only practiced in faithful marriages?  How many abortions?  What affect would it have on our welfare system if sex was respected as an act of love only performed in the context of marriage?

If we teach our children that sex is bad, then I believe we set them up to fail.  With entire cities flaunting the attitude ‘what happens here stays here’, we must educate our children about sex; we must place sex in context with marriage, love, and unity as it was created by God.  Has America ‘dropped the ball’ regarding sex?  Maybe.  Will you?