Feeling down…

It’s late, after 1am.  I am up.  Working on a project for work – something unimportant.  My wife is upstairs in bed.  Why am I working again?  Because I know.  I know that going to bed just brings tomorrow sooner.  And tomorrow brings another 12 or more hours of the same thing today brought.  Nothing.  Emptiness.  Everyday is the same.  It’s like a calendar that is supposed to have a new cartoon on each new day, but for the last several years, I pull off today to see the same cartoon on tomorrow’s page.  Nothing changes.  I’m still not doing what I know I should be doing, I’m still fighting the same flaws, the same thoughts, the same issues, the same temptations.   I’m still failing in the same places.  When will I get it?  Whatever it is, that life has been trying to teach me for the last several years.

The toilet down here has a leak.

One thought on “Feeling down…

  1. Karline

    This was EXACTLY what I was trying to reference in our last conversation. Everyday is the same… but there have been new developments. Some really cool things that God is doing. We’ll catch up by phone. Lov ya!

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